Indefinable. Me.

i need
i need
i need

i want

I’ve been so bored- oh God it’s not even funny anymore. Wondering how i’m still able to maintain such a deceivingly sane mentality. I’ve resorted to being driver number two as a productive form of bore relief. 

I miss Shamin

and i hate NS for that.

I want my Shamin! :’( I have no one to talk to on the phone anymore, especially now (of all times lah) when i’m dying of boredom! no one to share my dreams of working at an ice-cream parlour, or take stupid pictures with (point and smile). Green mohawk and fat blue eye-ed girl! Owww…

I was just thinking of my activities for my remaning 2 and a half weeks.

Wed (tomorrow)- nothing

Thurs- nothing

Fri- KL HOPEFULLY PLEASEEEEE and outing at night

Sat- nothing (OH, but someone getting license :p :p)

Sun- church/ nothing

Mon- nothing

and basically the same pattern follows. Trickle effect, yay.

Save me, someone. Anyone.

Too much in fact. I must taste good. Ha ha ha. It gets annoying though, i hate that thing. Bitch.

Listing out some thoughts, simplified, cause i can’t be stuffed structuring proper sentences:

I’m not liking the idea of having a license but not being granted the permission to drive out. Fuck it.

Serrrrreeeeeemban, oh seremban. Quiet. I’m sick of unhappening places, really.

I’m so over roti boms. I want chendol.

And tandoori chicken. Mmm…

Singapore sales had better still be on.

Sarah Barah! I haven’t seen that woman in a while. Looking forward to it

I need want a new wallet.

And a new bag.

And a new pair of bikini.

I hate you i hate you i hate you, i love you.

I should start packing. Parting from seremban was once hard. Now, it’s whats keeping me sane. Leaves the thoughts behind, even if it’s only for the weekend.

We do the appropriate just cause we think it’s the right thing to do.

At least, that’s what your head’s telling  you. What does the heart say?

I want the beach. Pleaseeee don’t pour down this weekend.

"Rain, rain, go away. Come again another day"

Don’t you hate being fat? It sickens me everyday.

I’m starting to prefer cats to dogs. I hate that dumb mutt at home.

I think i shall accidently poison it.

Or maybe accidently run it over, which would be the day, cause i’m still not allowed to drive on my own, yet.

Is it me, or is the word "yet" starting to let me down….

Don’t worry.

I like Happy Tree Friends. They fake their feelings as well as i do.

We can’t let this gey away.
Let it out, let it out.
Don’t get caught up in youself.
Let it out.

Let’s start over.
It’s not over.
This love it killing me,
But you’re the only one.
It’s not over.

Daughtry- [It's not over]

Waking up to a grey start

The clouds heave loud sighs

as rain pours down consistently

Robbing the sun off his mighty morning glory

The rain makes me smile

Sets me in a tranquil state

Calms me in the midst of such pathetic turbulence

Still

I lie on my bed

the very same way since last night, last time, last year

thinking.

Reminiscences of past ephemeral memories

It does the same to you,

does it not?

Your indisputable behaviour, decision, conclusion towards Now.

Once again You’ve got me douting You, darling.

When she was 20, he was only 11.

Ewww. I know.

Now that it’s January, I am once again bored out of my mind. My loyal friends have deserted me for either NS (suckers) or college. Frankly, I wouldn’t really mind attending college up in KL cause really, NZ has no life. Their "clubbing" consists of soothing jazz music and a coupla glasses of wine. I wouldn’t necessarily consider that as fun but i am yet to accept the fact that it is plainly a different kind of lifestyle. I need out of NZ, send me to Australia! P L E A S E. Also, I’ve been severely deprived of hot boys. The only time i recall spotting two was while down at Mission Bay when the duo walked pass us along the sidewalk. Eventually, they ended up holding hands while approaching the beach. Hmm…

I know, it’s thaaaaaaat sad.

So, even though Steph is officially 18 of age this year, she will be divested of all means of legal teenage fun. Sadly, not only will i be an inexperienced driver while in NZ, but also sexually deprived due to the shortage of alluring boys. Why is that anyway?! Sad. I appologize for the ruleless usage of "sad"s in my post today, cause i really can’t think of any other word which best describes my current situation- s a d.

All i’m after for is just a bit of amusement. Is that so hard to offer? (;

Life’s a bore at the moment.

Oh well (: